“10 points.”
“What?”
“I’m going to start giving you points when you’re good.”
“Uh.. and what can I do with these points?”
“Nothing.”
“So you’re going to give me points but I can’t redeem them?”
“Yeah.”
“Well then screw your points.”
“Minus 10 points.”

“Do I just wear any shirt under this sweater?”
“Yeah, just wear one of your Uniqlo undershirts or something.”
“Uniqlo??”
“.. yeah?”
“UNIQLO?”
“Okay fine. Lululemon.”
“My wife doesn’t even know me anymore. We’re drifting apart.”

*sneezes*
“Ooookayyy…”
“What, are we at the stage in our marriage where you don’t even say ‘bless you’??”
“Do Chinese people say anything after you sneeze?”
“…”
“There. We’re at the stage in our marriage where we start adopting Chinese customs.”
“…”
“Wo ai ni!”